What the hell?!

OK, I'm a moron! I knew that my new thyroid med caused Hypocalcemia (lack of calcium) when I started taking it, even though my "doctor" didn't tell me that. I also knew that certain other medications that normal people take on a regular basis speed up the thyroid medication's affects, including the side affect of Hypocalcemia. Thus has been my past week.

I was getting ready for work bright and early on Saturday morning after having a relaxing day to myself. By that, I mean I was psyching myself up to getting out of bed. The first foot I put down was my left and I immediately collapsed onto it. I managed to hobble my way to gather my clean uniform and get into the shower. I spent the rest of the morning putting on my best impression of a Pink Flamingo with an inner ear infection. But, I realized I couldn't work that way. So, I called in sick. Then, spent the rest of the day wide awake, wondering if the damn thing was broken and smothering it in ice. Repeat for Sunday.

While trying futilely to stand on a what I thought was a broken leg, I began to remember all the things I'd read about the thyroid drug I'm on right now that makes me feel so great. I looked it up a few minutes ago and I was right: it's making my Hypocalcemia worse and causing me to lose bone mass too fast for my taste. Keeping in mind that I had Hypocalcemia when I went on the drug, taking the drug known to zap calcium from people's bodies wasn't exactly brilliant on mine or my "doctor"'s part. I have stress fractures in my left shin bone, self-diagnoses due to my lack of health insurance and lack of access to actual doctors who haven't poisoned me twice with the same drug. Keep in mind, "stress fractured in shin bone" is just another way of saying "shin splints". But, I only have them in my left leg. All thanks to the drug that makes everything better. Y'know, I decided to go on it because I felt it was time to worry about my physical health instead of my mental health for a while. BIG MISTAKE. I mean, the anti-anxiety stuff had side affects, but I'd much rather have that thing where I can't withhold information when I talk or the crazy giggles than have my leg break just 'cause I decided to go for a walk. Hyperthyroidism be damned!

Tomorrow, I have the indescribable joy of picking out my very first cane. I also have to wrap my leg in a Neoprene sleeve and wear orthopedic insoles in my shoes. For how long, who knows? The damage might be irreversible. Probably not, though. If I go off everything for a few months and then go back on the SSRI of my choosing, I should be fine. But, I do have to work in the meantime. Hell, I wanna work. I've been off work for 3 days and I'm already really, really bored. The only cure I have for that is work, especially since I can only sit in positions where my leg is elevated and can't walk yet. I'm going a little crazy, yes.

In summation, I have fractures in my leg due to a drug that's supposed to help me and I have to hobble like an old man for weeks. I also have to go off the drug and not take my medication for my Social Anxiety Disorder because I can't take it with the thyroid drug still in my system. I try to do the right thing for my body and my mind and get screwed for it. Yay! And, I had to use up most of my sick days on my stupid leg so I can't take time off to go to an anime con with voice actors in it next month. Losing a little more hope for my future career was kinda the straw that broke the camel's back. I'm pissed off, can you blame me? Didn't think so. Bis bald, buy bonds.